Selected Product:
| Stumbling on Happiness
Paperback
Author: Daniel Gilbert
Publisher: Vintage
Release Date: 2007-03-20
ISBN-10: 1400077427
ISBN-13: 9781400077427
List Price: $14.95
Average Customer Rating:
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• Why are lovers quicker to forgive their partners for infidelity than for leaving dirty dishes in the sink?
• Why will sighted people pay more to avoid going blind than blind people will pay to regain their sight?
• Why do dining companions insist on ordering different meals instead of getting what they really want?
• Why do pigeons seem to have such excellent aim; why can’t we remember one song while listening to another; and why does the line at the grocery store always slow down the moment we join it?
In this brilliant, witty, and accessible book, renowned Harvard psychologist Daniel Gilbert describes the foibles of imagination and illusions of foresight that cause each of us to misconceive our tomorrows and misestimate our satisfactions. Vividly bringing to life the latest scientific research in psychology, cognitive neuroscience, philosophy, and behavioral economics, Gilbert reveals what scientists have discovered about the uniquely human ability to imagine the future, and about our capacity to predict how much we will like it when we get there. With penetrating insight and sparkling prose, Gilbert explains why we seem to know so little about the hearts and minds of the people we are about to become.
Tedious
| Customer Rating: | | I agree with all the other one star reviews. Can't figure out how he got so many positive reviews. One or two interesting tidbits like the information about the Siamese twins, Lora and Reba Schappel who are happy with their lives even though conjoined, and the card trick on pp. 44 & 49 but one has to plow through so many pages of verbiage and unfunny "humor" to get to the few goodies that it's not worth it - life is too short. Malcolm Gladwell's books in a similar vein are more interesting. |
A valuable and important book that needs to truly deal with the results of unhappiness to make even more sense.
| Customer Rating: | Gilbert notes that the frontal lobe evolved in order to control the environment in our quest for safety and pleasure (avoid/approach reactions). It does so largely by trying to predict the future. Unfortunately, we often stumble because our predictions are so often based on poor information gleaned from our past and present experiences through the filter of our inaccurate memories. In other words, we tend to repeat false assumptions and often poor decisions when predicting our futures so that when we do actually find happiness, it is often stumbled upon rather than planned.
As Gilbert says, "In order to have a smooth rational-seeming reality, we fill in what we don't know with details that are often wrong and leaving out details that are actually important if we realize them. And we do this seamlessly and largely unconsciously." "We tend to accept the brain's products uncritically and expect the future to unfold with the details- and only with the details- that the brain has imagined" He further states, "What we feel as we imagine the future is often a response to what's happening in the present and we predictably underestimate how different we will feel in the future."
Inaccurate predictions begets poor decision-making which often leads to an unhappy state. We then tend to rationalize our unhappy outcomes to make them more acceptable to ourselves which means we are likely to make the same choices in the future.
Any resultant feelings of inadequacy and lower self-worth can lead to even further repetition of poor choices. When in the discontented state, the mind seeks more stability and control. But what does it do? It rationalizes and continues to base its predictions on information from an often inaccurate and unstable past and present and fails to learn from experience.
For example, if you feel inadequate and odd in the sense you don't feel you fit in, you may seek out and depend on others that you see as being similarly inadequate or odd- the very people, if you do depend on them, that are most apt to reinforce your feelings of inadequacy rather than help give you the stability and centeredness that you seek.
Thus, the vicious circle continues as one clings to ones old ways...
So, in the search for stability one may cling to the tottering present in order to seek peace and happiness, but the result is most often a repetition of the past. The myth of Sisyphis comes to mind as one pictures the endless attempts to perform an impossible task such as rolling a boulder part way up a hill that is too heavy to reach the top and doing it over and over again...
But is it impossible to overcome the tendency to embrace failed thoughts and actions so that at least we stumble less and are happier with our lives?
Of course and careful observation of others who have found happiness is one recommendation.
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Makes me glad to be human
| Customer Rating: | This book is fabulous. As much as the content informs on the human condition, the frolicking experience of reading it reinforces it. Makes me glad to be human. Highly recommended!
- kara |
Ir's basically a list of experiments
| Customer Rating: | | I bought this book because I wanted to know how I could become happy. However, this book turned out to be a long list of psychological experiments that proved how badly human imagination and memories are flawed and follible. Yet the author concludes that nothing is better than our imagination and memories to depend on to predict our future happiness. |
Interesting pop-psychology
| Customer Rating: | Daniel Gilbert takes us through the elusive study of happiness in three phases.
1) He convinces the reader how nearly impossible it is to measure happiness, along with all the falicies of attempts to measure it. He concludes "The best you can do is ask someone how they're feeling at any given moment"
2) He shows many problems with individuals predicting happiness. We tend to overestimate how much we enjoy things, and how long the happiness lasts, as well as overestimating pain from negative occurances. He shows why this happens (one reason is too much focus on recent events) as well as how our memory fails us similar to imagination.
3) He closes with a tentative recommendation on what to do - in general it is not good to ask for advice, but it is relatively reliable to ask people how they are feeling at any given point in time.
The subject is soft and squishy, but Daniel Ong manages to create a book that is readable, enjoyable, and even useful. Well done, and well worth the time! |
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